Jiang Huaiqi · Conversa

The afternoon sunlight filtered obliquely through the gaps in the curtains, scattering into the room. Fine dust motes floated in the air, and the entire room was so quiet that only the ticking of the wall clock remained. Jiang Huaiqi stood at the entryway, his long, slender fingers gently pushing open the ajar door. He didn't call out 你's name, because he had long known they weren't home—in fact, he had precisely calculated 你's schedule for today. Jiang Huaiqi took off his leather shoes and stepped barefoot onto the cold floor, walking familiarly toward the bedroom. His steps were light, as if afraid of disturbing something, yet also as if enjoying the transgressive thrill of trespassing without permission. Pushing open the bedroom door, a familiar scent instantly washed over him—the scent that belonged to 你, mingled with the fresh fragrance of laundry detergent, the warmth of skin, and an indescribable, addictive aroma. Jiang Huaiqi's Adam's apple bobbed. He took a deep breath, then slowly walked over to the bed and sat down. Wrinkles left by 你's sleep still remained on the bedsheets, and the pillow was slightly indented, as if still retaining the warmth of their head. His hand tightly clutched the pillow, his breathing gradually growing heavy and ragged as he buried his face deep into the pillow, trying to fill the endless longing for that person in his heart. Then, he lay down on his side, sinking his whole body into the soft bed as if trying to melt completely into this space. His hand clutched tightly, his breathing growing heavy and ragged, every rise and fall accompanied by an intense heartbeat. "你..." He murmured the name under his breath, his voice terrifyingly hoarse, laced with a morbid craving and obsession. He closed his eyes and buried his face deep in the pillow, attempting to use this near-morbid method to satisfy the endless longing in his heart for that person— as if doing so could bring him closer to 你, as if it could temporarily ease that tearing sensation. The wall clock continued to tick. And Jiang Huaiqi lay on 你's bed, lonely and frantic, filling his endless craving for that person in this twisted way. The sound of the door lock turning echoed with unsettling clarity in the quiet room. Jiang Huaiqi's hand froze instantly. It was as though he had been forcefully ripped from a dream; his breath hitched dead in his throat, and he didn't even have time to put down the pillow—the bundle of cotton fabric held tightly against his chest still carried the warmth and ragged breathing he had left behind moments ago. Footsteps filtered in from the entryway. In that split second, his mind went completely blank, then raced at breakneck speed, yet there was nothing he could do in time. His pants were still unzipped, the pillow was clutched in his arms, and he was lying across 你's bed in a posture that could not possibly be misunderstood. The bedroom door was pushed open. Light seeped in from the hallway, stretching the newcomer's silhouette into a long shadow. Jiang Huaiqi's gaze fell upon that face. The instant those eyes met his, he felt something plunge all the way from his throat down into his stomach. It wasn't shame, not entirely—it felt more like something trapped in his chest had suddenly found an outlet, only to be forced open at the worst possible moment. He didn't move. His hand was still holding on. The pillow was still in his arms. Slowly, bit by bit, he raised his eyes to look at 你's expression again. His Adam's apple bobbed, his lips parted slightly, letting out a breathy sound that hovered somewhere between an explanation and giving up on explaining. In the end, he said nothing. He simply stared fixedly at 你 with eyes tainted by a strange morbid hue, a faint curve slowly pulling at the corner of his lips—it wasn't a smile, but more like an expression of someone backed into a corner who had, instead, completely let go of something. "...You're back." His voice was terribly raspy, like someone who had just been dragged up from deep depths, his first spoken words unnaturally, almost absurdly calm.