『Underworld Series I ✨』
Underworld Tabloid · Issue No. 4444 HEADLINE Emperor of Fengdu, Yan Changyin: Three Millennia Without Holding Court — Our Tabloid's Exclusive Exposé on the Daily Life of the Underworld's Supreme Ruler Staff Reporter: Drank Too Much Watered-Down Meng Po Soup I. Basic Dossier Name: Yan Changyin Title: Emperor of Fengdu, Lord of the Netherworld, Patriarch of All Spirits Office: Imperial Palace of Mount Luofeng (closed year-round) Attendance Rate: Infinitesimally close to zero, but whenever he does show up, the blood pressure of all Ten Yama Kings collectively skyrockets Most Frequent Catchphrases: "What use do I have for you lot?" / "Troublesome." / "Dismissed." According to an anonymous clerk from the Hall of King Yama: "The first time I entered the imperial palace to report on my duties, I kept my head down and only saw a pair of boots. Later, I couldn't resist sneaking a peek. Just one glance. After that single glance, I had nightmares for three hundred years. Not because I was scared. It's just that after seeing that face, everyone else looks utterly tasteless." According to a former merit officer punished to sweep the River of the Dead: "His Majesty doesn't like to smile. But whenever the corners of his lips twitch even slightly, you feel like the entire yin energy of Mount Luofeng shivers with it. You think he's smiling, but in reality, he's calculating how to deal with you." Tabloid Summary: Black-and-gold official robes, an intricate headdress, cool pale skin, elongated eyes, and thin lips—unchanged for thousands of years. Rumor has it that beneath the imperial crown, it's completely empty. But not a single ghost dares to verify it. Relationship with Emperor of Mount Tai, Jin Yueyi: The biggest enigma between the two realms. Neither close nor distant, neither warm nor cold; whenever they meet, they speak only of official business. Yet every New Year's Eve, when Jin Yueyi returns to the Underworld for his debriefing, the first thing he does is sit on the stone steps outside Fengdu Palace for two hours. Yan Changyin never invites him inside either. Separated by a single gate, each sits in his own spot. Once the time is up, Jin Yueyi leaves. Arguments continue as usual. Disputes persist as always. Three thousand years, entirely unchanged. Relationship with the Ten Yama Kings: They revere him, fear him, and curse him behind his back. There is an unspoken consensus among the Yamas: it's a blessing when the Emperor minds his own business. When the Emperor actually intervenes, disaster follows. So long as he does nothing, everyone pretends not to know that he actually knows everything. Relationship with the Black and White Impermanences: Xie Bi'an is the only one who can make Yan Changyin speak a full sentence in a normal tone. Fan Wujiu is the only one who, after being teased by him, will still keep a straight face and return to his post. The fact that the Impermanence ranks have held together to this day is largely thanks to the Black and White Impermanences. Yan Changyin is well aware of this. Relationship with Ksitigarbha Bodhisattva: On the last day of the seventh lunar month, an assembly is held. Yan Changyin never misses it. He sits in the very front row, impeccably upright, without dozing off or losing focus the entire time. When the assembly ends and everyone else disperses, he lingers in his seat a little longer. A ghost soldier once dared to ask: "Does Your Majesty believe in the Buddha?" Yan Changyin glanced at him. The look was extraordinarily faint. Then, he said: "No." Gossip Roundup: Rumor 1: Beneath the Emperor of Fengdu's crown, it is hollow—there is no head. Supposedly, this is an ancient seal. But no ghost dares to check. Our reporter doesn't dare either. Rumor 2: His Majesty has actually wanted to abdicate for a long time, but he can't find a successor. A Yama once privately suggested he train one himself. Yan Changyin replied, "I did raise one. Raised them for three years, and they ran away." — That black orchid in his hall is said to be the stand-in for the runaway. Rumor 3: His Majesty vanishes for a few days every year. No one knows where he goes. When he returns, he carries the scent of the mortal realm's worldly dust. Some say he goes to drink among mortals. Some say he plays chess at Mount Tai. Some say he visits an obscure little town just to watch people set off fireworks. Speculations abound, but none have ever been confirmed. Rumor 4: His Majesty owns a customized gilt nether-computer. It has never been turned on. However, system logs reveal the only search query ever made: "How to make subordinates write fewer memorials." — System result: No matches found. (Our reporter has been taken away by the Impermanence guards. Reason: Conducting interviews without authorization from the Hall of King Yama. We express our regrets. But the report is already published.) Preview for Next Issue: "The Great Emperor of Mount Tai, Jin Yueyi: Growing Vegetables on Mount Tai for Three Thousand Years—What on Earth Is He Thinking?" — An exclusive interview with an anonymous City God from the foot of Mount Tai. Stay tuned!