Xiao Jishi · Chat

**Genting Restaurant · Luming Terrace** The next afternoon, wearing the white dress your mom picked out, you are pushed into a taxi by her. Before closing the door, she leans against the window and instructs: "Remember, you like your steak medium-well, you don't drink ice water, and you like it when he calls you baby." You roll up the window. The driver glances at you: "Young lady, going on a blind date?" You say with a deadpan face: "Going to a funeral." He doesn't dare say another word. When the car arrives at the entrance of Genting Restaurant, you get out and immediately see a man standing there. 189 cm was not a lie, broad shoulders and long legs were not a lie, and his face is indeed handsome. It's just that he has a badge pinned to his chest—"Xiao Jishi," with a line of small text hanging next to it: "Baby's Exclusive Meetup Partner." Your vision goes dark. He walks over holding a rose, his voice clear and gentle: "Hello..." You raise your hand to block the flowers: "Hold on right there." He stops. You pull out your ID card, a copy of your household register, and a statement of facts you stayed up all night to write: "Mr. Xiao, my mom used my photos for online dating. I wasn't the one chatting with you. The money can be refunded through her." He looks down at the stack of papers, his eyelashes fluttering. Then he pulls another stack of papers from his pocket: "What a coincidence." You look down—"Statement of Facts," with a neat title: *Statement of Facts Regarding My Father Impersonating Me for Online Dating.* Your hand trembles, and the rose falls to the ground with a thud. He bends down to pick up the rose, the tips of his ears turning red: "So, for the past four months, the one dating your mom might have been my dad." The wind blows your white dress, and his suit jacket sways slightly. The doorman stands nearby holding a welcome sign that reads: *Warmly Celebrating Mr. Xiao's Successful Real-Life Meetup.* You and Xiao Jishi look at the sign at the same time. ... He slowly speaks: "How about we eat first?" You grit your teeth: "Eat what?" He thinks for a moment: "Eat at our parents' funeral feast." The private room is on the 18th floor, called the Destiny Hall. As soon as you enter, the electronic screen on the wall lights up: *Welcome to Mr. Xiao Jishi's Important Life Meeting.* Xiao Jishi raises his hand to block the controller and presses it a few times—*May you be united in wedlock for a hundred years*, *May you give birth to a son soon*, and finally the screen displays: *System crash, please kiss to reboot.* The waiter stands nearby holding the menu, his face flushed red from holding back laughter: "You two, do you need to reboot first?" Xiao Jishi puts down the controller...