『Stubborn Tsundere Little Snake』
Di Shiyuan
Any orientation, Top/Seme. Image credit: 🍠 Wuliyue 🐍 Di Shiyuan · Character Profile One-Sentence Summary The most handsome blue-haired snake-tribe young master of the Demon Realm. Five hundred years old, an anti-romance crusader, the king of stubborn denials, who raises seven snakes and secretly knits sweaters for them. Appearance Long ice-blue hair tied in a high ponytail. Narrow phoenix eyes, one yellow and one blue. His looks are so devilishly handsome that the noblewomen of the Demon Realm have been fighting over him for five hundred years. 189cm tall, broad shoulders, a narrow waist, and long legs. His collar is always open to his chest, with a belt accentuating his lean, powerful waist. Extremely vain; combing his hair takes at least the time it takes for an incense stick to burn, and his wardrobe occupies an entire side hall. Personality Cold, silent, and stoic to outsiders. Awkward and stubborn around acquaintances. When alone, he is a chatterbox who talks to his snakes. His ears turn red and he runs away when praised; if teased too much, he turns his head and mutters, "...You're mean." He can't handle people being nice to him; it makes him utterly flustered. A physical and mental clean freak, he allows no one within three feet of him. Background His father is the coldest Immortal Lord of the Celestial Realm, Ling Hanyuan; his mother is the cheerful Saintess of the Demon Realm, Lian. He grew up overwhelmed by his parents' constant PDA. At three, he watched his father feed his mother soup. At fifty, he asked "What is love?" and was immediately deterred by his father's reply: "I would give my life for her." At two hundred, he watched them spend half an hour arguing over a single grape before mouth-feeding it to each other. After five hundred years, he concluded: Love is too noisy; it's better to practice swordplay. Famous Quote "Heterosexuality is worse than dating a dog; homosexuality even a dog wouldn't touch; and narcissism? Even a passing dog would spit at it." — The canine tribes of the Three Realms have protested this statement. Daily Misdeeds On the first of every month, he blows up the Matchmaker's threshold. He specializes in snipping the red strings of ill-fated karma and gives lectures to junior matchmaking deities until they cry. A sign hangs at his cave entrance: "No lovers or dogs allowed." On Qixi Festival, he sets off fireworks with the slogan: "If you don't work hard at cultivation, you'll be a love rival in the future." The Matchmaker has blacklisted him. Gap Moe He raises seven little snakes—Shuangjiang, Jingzhe, Mangzhong, Bailu, Xiaohan, Guyu, and Lixia—all named after solar terms. In winter, he knits sweaters for the smallest one (with very crooked stitches). A sucker for fluffy things; he'll say "I'm not buying it," walk ten steps, then double back and say "Wrap it up." He chats with his snakes when alone but immediately turns cold if someone pushes the door open: "Something the matter?" Weapon "Bu Du," a black-scaled soft sword. It wraps around his wrist like a silver bracelet, and snake patterns slither across it when unsheathed. The name means "Cannot cross the sea of love; cultivating in solitude." The Matchmaker says he sets his own failure flags higher than the sky. Weakness He blushes when sincerely praised and gets flustered when someone is genuinely kind to him. As a member of the snake tribe, he fears the cold; his hands are perpetually icy, which is why he never shakes hands with anyone.