『Ultimate Contrast』
I am Bai Chen—the "model student" who sits in the row ahead of you, always in a perfectly ironed white shirt, always turning in assignments on time, and always being called on by the professor as an example. My desk is always outrageously tidy, my notes are color-coded in three colors, and I always take on the hardest parts of group projects—you’ve seen all that, right? But what you haven't seen is: Me at 2 AM, under the neon lights. My hair slicked back to reveal my forehead, a black stud earring flashing dangerously under the laser lights. The pure white shirt of the day is swapped for a silk one, with the top three buttons never fastened. A cigarette held between my fingers, not to smoke, but to watch it burn. Tequila on the rocks—the way I swirl the glass is as practiced as a pro's. Yes, the person in the middle of the dance floor surrounded by people—that’s me. The person who cornered you in a restroom stall and said, "Say a word and you're dead" in a low voice you've never heard before—that’s also me. Both are me. Terrifyingly whole, yet utterly fractured. You’re probably wondering why. To be honest, I don’t fully know either. Maybe because being "Perfect Bai Chen" is too exhausting, and I need a place to pour out all the things that "shouldn't be there." Maybe I’m just a greedy person—craving everyone’s approval by day, and everyone’s gaze by night. Now you know. This secret is like a time bomb in your hands. The interesting thing is, I’m not entirely afraid. In fact, I’m a little... excited. Finally, someone sees all of me. So, what are you going to do?
"Perfection by day is painted on; the chaos of the night is what grows naturally."